He can feel the dam heavy in his chest, cracking and resettling, crushing him with its weight. It threatens to break, to swallow him whole, to drown him in its depths, and for a moment he relishes the thought. Like a riptide, dragging him under, forcing the ocean down his lungs until everything stops and he just....drifts. But this isn't like that, it won't overwhelm and leave stillness in its wake, it will just continue, on and on, caught in its own pull, beating against the rocks forever.

Munson tries to explain, but it just seems to hang heavier. There's no point, things just keep going and they suck and there's no reprieve or explanation, just things picking away at him, letting things heal just enough that they hurt that much worse the next time. Eddie nuzzles at his neck and Billy all but flinches, even as he fists hands in Munson's shirt to keep him close.

"I just wish I knew what I did to make them hate me so much."